It's about a soft velvet hammer that sets you just right...Badda Bing!...and you're all smiles and charm.  -Johnnie

Johnnie's Classic "Friggin' Great" Martini Recipe

This martini recipe works equally well to produce a premium vodka or a quality gin martini.  Johnnie discusses each martini ingredient and how to combine them to produce a very good, dry martini.  We think it produces the best martini we've ever tasted, but Johnnie is too modest to make that claim.  Regardless, this is a martini you could serve in any upscale martini lounge.

What follows is Johnnie's recipe for a "Friggin' Great" martini, in his own words...

Defining The Best Martini Recipe.

Now, before we get into it, you need to understand something about what you're shooting for here.  It's all about smooth.  It's about class.  It's about a soft velvet hammer that sets you just right.  Badda Bing!  ...and you're all smiles and charm. 

It's like a warm, friendly kiss on the cheek from a classy lady that leaves just a hint of her perfume that lingers on you the rest of the day. 

It's a friggin' great martini!  Kabeesh?

Preparing For A Vodka Martini Recipe.

Okay.  I'm not going to promote any particular brand of booze here.  Not until one of the big boys makes it worth my while...if you know what I mean.  Besides, it's like choosing a car.  No one wants to drive a hunk of junk, but some prefer BMW, others want Mercedes, and then there's the guy who wants something classy like a Maserati. 

Let us just say that quality counts for a lot here.  If you're gonna pour garbage into your glass, I can't help you 'cause...  Well, it's gonna taste like garbage.  Your martini is not where you want to trim the family budget...you know what I'm saying?  Grow up!  Become a man and make enough to enjoy the finer things.  'Nuff said.

If we're making a friggin' great vodka martini, we need to start with a friggin' great vodka.  You don't want that garbage they pour from behind the bar.  Top shelf, Boy Wonder!  That's the stuff we want. 

How About A Gin Martini Recipe?

It's the same story, just a different tune.  You want a good quality gin.  A martini made with gin is going to taste differnt than a vodka martini.  Some guys like gin.  That's fine.  It's just a matter of your personal taste.

The important thing is that you find what works for you and not stand around drinking something just because some snapper head said that's what they drink or that everyone else drinks.  Be your own man.  Kabeesh?

This martini recipe I'm sharing with you fits a gin martini just as well as a vodka martini.  So, if you're not sure I suggest that you try both out and go with what works for you.

The Secret Martini Ingredient

So, we now have our vodka or gin.  Okay, all you amateurs, listen up!  Do not put your booze in your freezer. 

Most of you's guys don't know this yet, but I'm here to educate you in the ways of this world. 

Water is part of the martini recipe.  That's right princess, we want some water in our cocktail.  The water comes from the ice that we use to cool the drink and if you leave the vodka in the freezer it will be just as cold as the ice.  If the vodka is as cold as the ice, it won't melt the ice.  Kabeesh?

The water smoothes things out and if you're sticking your vodka in the freezer it will be too cold to melt the ice sufficiently and there won't be enough water to pacify the booze.  That's why your martini has been a little harsh there, Einstein...

Additional Dry Martini Ingredients

Alright, for a dry martini you will need dry vermouth.  Get the big fat martini olives to garnish, a classy martini glass, a cocktail shaker and ice.  If you don't have these things, stop reading and go get 'em princess.

Pay attention.  The martini glass goes into your ice.  A cold glass is a good thing.  You could put it in your freezer, but the ice will cool it more quickly and you don't necessarily want it to be frosted. 

Leave the glass in the ice and fill your shaker with more ice.  You're now ready to begin.

Johnnie's Martini Recipe Revealed

Pour about 3 oz. of the gin or vodka into the shaker, enough to fill your martini glass.  Put the lid on it (the shaker), and shake the friggin' thing.  Not like a maraca or a pair of dice!  Easy.  Gentle. 

What's it matter how you shake it?  Pay attention.  If you shake it real hard, you're gonna break up that ice.  Your drink is going to be filled with little shards of ice and you'll get too much water into the cocktail. 

Shake it nice and gentle.  You'll chill the vodka just fine and it won't get "bruised."  Some people stir it to avoid bruising the gin, or the vodka.  Stir?  Shake?  It doesn't matter, as long as you understand that you want to be gentle.  All that flippin' and tossin' the shaker around is good for show, but it's hell on your cocktail.

Now, put the cocktail shaker down.  Retrieve your cold martini glass.  Pour a small amount of dry vermouth into your glass and swirl the glass three or four times. 

You're just trying to coat the sides of the glass.  Dump the remaining vermouth and give the martini glass a good shake while holding it upside down.  Understand that the vermouth is like that classy broad's perfume that just hints at its presence.  Too much, she stinks.  A small film of dry vermouth on a martini glass goes a long way.  Alot of martini recipes have you dumping a cap full in with the booze, but it's not what you want to do. 

You swirled your cold martini glass and it is now primed with the vermouth.  With a strainer, pour your chilled vodka into your martini glass.  Garnish with one of those nice fat martini olives.  If you have an appetite, skewer two or three of them on a cocktail pick. Smile my friend.  You've got a friggin' great martini in your hand...  Salute! -Johnnie

Selecting A Vodka For Your Martini